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Spoons Everywhere

I had some stories in my head today, several, and I wanted to tell them to people. So I put on my trench coat, filled it's pockets with spoons, styled my hair and caught the nearest bus. I wasn't quite sure which story I wanted to tell first so I thought I'd tell a bit of one, then a bit of another, then a bit of another and then some more of the one I started with, and so on. The stories were all just so great they had to be told much like a cubist would paint.

I sat next to a young woman who carried a revolver in her hand bag. She didn't like my stories, I could tell be the way she reached for it. Was it my breath? My changes in inflection? The problems I had controlling the tone of my voice? Was the gun fake? Possibly, but I was in no mood for a gamble. I didn't want to add that to my list of stories.

But, I'm no quitter. My stories had to be told! So I begun on the man sitting across the aisle from me. Since he was wearing a cap, and blue jeans, I thought he might enjoy the story of overpriced bus fares and the one about my losing millions. He quickly left and kicked me a little as he did. I would have kept on with the tellings to other people, everywhere, but just then the bus hit a bump, and all my spoons went flying. Spoons everywhere. Before I rushed to pick them up, I took the time to wear a look of petrified horror.


sybil law said...

Lab in the sky, balls in the air...

JMH said...

Stories to tell, but no one wants to hear. Why is it so difficult to get someone to listen? They should have a special seat on the bus, at the front, elevated, maybe hanging, maybe red, where you could climb up and sit and tell stories to delight and disgust your fellow riders. And earn tips.

Asylum Dolly said...

This inspired many a hilarious mental image! The cutlery was the best part :D No, wait- the "shuffle bum" part.
I would've listened!

hahahaha! My verification word is "colon"!!!! serious! Word verification is starting to freak me out.

John Dantzer said...

Sybil - One would be fine, but the both of them are cause for celebration.

JMH - That is a good idea. Especially the tips part. I could be rich.

Bon - No one should listen. It's like listening to two radios at once.

Word verification is getting more and more dirty. Mine was swoccen. Ew.