Alfred the Man Eating Horse

A horse came in and ate some cornflakes, we all watched in silence and listened to the crunching. The one bowl, though, did not sate his appetite and he started thrashing his head to and fro. I opened the fridge door hoping to placate the beast with the goods inside, but when Alfred (as he later called himself) went for the milk he couldn't chomp his way through the plastic and instead threw the jug across the room hitting poor Sandy in the ovaries. Her infertility problems grew worse because of this. I opened the "Crisper" as it is called, drawing the horses attention to the salad therein, but once again it was covered in plastic. So, with great trepidation I removed the plastic and offered the lettuce to Alfred. We then watched and listened as he chomped that down.

"Good, Alfred," Patty said, as though to a child. Alfred's ears perked and he cast Patty a devious glance. His ears went back and he turned his mass to face her and walked toward her with his head down and mouth snarling. Patty braced for the worse, and believe me, it was bad. Alfred, the Man Eating Horse, grabbed Patty with his jaws and threw her across the room by force of his powerful neck and she flew hard against the wall. A wound opened and before long she was lying in a pool of her own blood. None of us knew what to do on account of the demon horse with the shifty eyes. Knowing horses proclivity towards apples I grabbed a few and flung them out the window. Alfred knew what they were, was hungry, and jumped out the window after them destroying the wall in his path.

We managed to stop Patty's bleeding. She is now anemic and has sold her ranch.