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Smell My Breath

"Smell my breath."

"Why would I smell your breath?"

"Just do it. Smell it."

"No. I wouldn't smell your breath if your mouth was made out of a flower."

"Ew. My breath smells better than flowers. Smell it."

"I wouldn't smell your breath even if money escaped as vapour, and the money could be pulled from my nose and spent on candy."

"My breath smells better than candy. You won't be able to know what it smells like until you smell it."

"I wouldn't smell your breath even if upon smelling it I was gained tremendous insight and furious will that I could use toward my goal of rebuilding the broken glass."

"It will give you insight, and everything furious. I promise. Now go ahead and smell it."

"Haven't you been listening? I won't smell your breath ever. Not ever."

"Will you smell it for bats foot, hawks claw and tear of dragon?"

"Tear of dragon, eh? Fine. One sniff."

(Smell his breath)

"OMG! What have you been eating?!"

"Dog poo."

(The smeller was granted nothing, except for horrible memories of when he was mauled by 6-10 vicious dogs.)


sybil law said...

Where would someone get the tear of a dragon, anyway?

Anyway - payback time for the smeller!

Rassles said...

The word "poo" creeps me out more than any other word. Visible shivers.

John Dantzer said...

sybil - Smellee will get it bad.

Rassles - poo poo poo diddley poo poo.

Anonymous said...

You're funny. You already knew that.
Anyhoo, just thought i'd drop into bloggyland and bring my old blog buddies some blog biscuits. That sounds gross. I hope all is well in your world!
Fare thee well, mr Wobblington.

John Dantzer said...

Thanks Bon,

I miss you here in bloggyland! I'd love some of your blog biscuits (upon writing, it does sound grosser than reading, but I'd love some anyway.)

Fare yourself well.