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Magic Cards: Fossil

I know what you are thinking.  You are thinking, "Jorg, fossils are so old.  Why do you want to associate with such old things?"

Well that is just baditude, friendo. Ok, true enough, fossils are "old", but you know what?  So is the earth itself, but we don't sit around saying, "Fuck this place.  It is old.  I'm muthafucking outta here."  Then you try and leave, but guess what buddy you can't.  The grass grows, the leaves fall down, it  snows and so on. 

Now you are thinking, "So what you're saying, Jorgie, is that fossils are young?  That's the craziest muthafucking thing I think I ever heard.  I am OUT!"  And you try leaving, but you forgot where the door is and walk into a closet instead but are too proud to admit it and stay in there till you think I fall asleep, but guess what?  I am just closing my eyes.  Trust me, I am wide awake and I see you there sneak out, and by now it's night time and that's when you are most likely to get mugged so good luck with that buddy.

Listen, I know fossils aren't young, ok, but if you could just please get over it, ok.  If the fossil is 3 million years old or whatever and you keep it in your mouth for however long, 40 years give or take, then the fossil will be 3 million years and 40, whilst you will be in your grave buddy so think about that the next time you want to call an old person a fossil.  Fossils can be hip and with it too you guys.  I seen them dance, and oh wow.

1 comment:

drollgirl said...

we are all heading towards fossil-dom, like it or not! might as well embrace it